More on Masks

What is going on with masks?

Someone started a war. A mask is the new religion. You are with us or against us, pick a side, show your allegiance.

It’s playing out on social media, there are two sides and the mask wearers on the good side. People who don’t wear them are stupid and selfish. They are the people who voted for Brexit, the ‘Karen’s’, the idiots. There are videos of angry, middle aged, flabby women shouting at shop staff who won’t serve them and everyone comments. Only a little of the clip is shown, the bit where they have finally lost it and look like a ranting demon. We never know what was said before. The video goes viral, the person loses their job and everyone hates them. They are judged, tried and popped in the bin marked ‘loonies’, waiting execution. Anyone who questions the validity or efficacy of face mask wearing is assigned to the same bin.

A very rigid thought pattern has developed around the issue. It’s been quick too. Only yesterday politicians preferred not to wear them and today even Donald Trump (who probably had enough power to decide for himself) is pictured with his security guards looking like something out of a Quentin Tarintino film.

Everyone is treating this picture as though it’s the moment Trump wins the next election, or maybe found a cure for every disease in the world.

I hate how scared this issue is making me feel. I’m sure someone will tell me I’m being over sensitive  but it just feels that at any moment the non-mask wearers could be rounded up and removed from society.

I’m scared to write here that I would prefer not to wear a mask. I’m not enough of a fighter to ever stand up for that choice and if it became compulsory I would either wear one, or avoid the places where wearing it is compulsory. I wish I wasn’t claustrophobic. I wish I could cover my face and nose without an uncontrollable panic rising in my chest, tears pricking at my eyes, a lump in my throat, which eventually leads to a ringing sensation in my ears that causes everything real to fall away and running is the only option but it does, so I expect my world will have to become more limited.

I have a walkers cotton snood that I have put in my handbag just in case anyone does ask me to wear a mask. It feels slightly less claustrophobic which probably means it’s not effective but at the moment we are only being advised to cover our mouth and nose in enclosed spaces.

I was very glad I had it with me yesterday. I received a phone call to say that I could collect my contact lenses. When I got there the lady was standing at the door talking to someone, so I stayed back. When they left she looked at me quizzically.
“I’ve come to collect my contact lenses,” I said.
She looked at me darkly, so I added.
“I had a phone call.”
“Do you have a mask?” She snapped, continuing before I could answer. “I can’t let you in unless you have a mask. I’m really sorry,” she said, not sounding sorry at all.
“I have a face covering,” I said, “But I don’t need to come in, you could just hand them to me. They’re paid for.”
That got me in and she kept apologising for the rules. They are the rules. Rules are rules. It’s the new normal. I felt on edge as she kept looking a my snood as though it wasn’t the right kind of face covering.
“Oh, you pay by standing order,” she said.
“Yes, you just need me to squiggle,” I said in my best cheerful sing song voice.
“Oh no. We won’t do that. I’ll just write on it. We can’t have you touching any pens or anything!”
I thought about telling her that I had my own pen but instead I just smiled. Unfortunately she couldn’t see it because it was covered by my snood.

I can see how some people would get angry in that situation, however she was just scared and following ‘rules’ to keep people safe. I get that but I really want the old normal back. The normal where we ignored the risks to our lives. It wasn’t perfect but I knew how to navigate it.