It sounds like I'm bragging but I really do have the best job in the world. I get to sing songs, bang at instruments, play games all day long. This evening was our school summer music concert and it's just the best thing in the world. I wind the children up and tell them they can do solos, they get all excited, practice for weeks and weeks, choose snazzy outfits to wear and I take all the credit. I even got given a lovely bunch of flowers for doing something that I really wanted to do.
I get to listen to fantastic music. I get to wear my posh frock and high heel shoes (I do love being tall but I couldn't do it all the time). The best part of the evening for a lot of the children was when I tripped over the edge of the bench. I get to rabbit on about how fantatic they all are. Sometimes I even get to tell a joke. My rambling isn't scripted and I often catch myself and wonder what on earth I am saying or what I might say next. Tonight, was a close one. Our French Horn player was about to play her solo and I was about to launch into one of my favourite jokes. I nearly said, "Did you hear about the the who girl went out on a date with a trumpet player, and when she came back her roommate asked, "Well, how was it? Did his embouchure make him a great kisser?"
"Nah," the first girl replied. "That dry, tight, tiny little pucker; it was no fun at all."
The next night she went out with a tuba player, and when she came back her roommate asked, "Well, how was his kissing?"
"Ugh!" the first girl exclaimed. "Those huge, rubbery, blubbery, slobbering slabs of meat; oh, it was just gross!"
The next night she went out with a French horn player, and when she came back her roommate asked, "Well, how was his kissing?"
"Well," the first girl replied, "his kissing was just so-so; but I loved the way he held me!"
Luckily, I stopped myself in time otherwise I could have lost the best job in the world.
No comments:
Post a Comment