Life's Too Short for Bitches

From the title of this blog you are probably expecting a rant about how women should be nicer to each other. You would be forgiven for thinking that someone has upset me but the truth is that it's the end of an eight week half term and I just don't have the energy to be upset by anyone or anything. At the end of such long half terms it can take all a teacher's creativity just to keep the children awake, whilst still doing the usual panicking about whether paperwork is up to date, plans are in place for next term, in the hope that they can have some time off over the next week. 

My complete lack of energy is always helped by owning a dog. Dogs are brilliant for your mental health. They are always pleased to see you, even when you are so grumpy all the humans in your family have placed a 3 mile exclusion zone around you. Dogs force you into the outside world. Having to go for a walk twice a day is a surprising energy booster. When you'd much rather be in bed, the big brown eyes persuade you to explore the big outdoors. Even a short walk seems to lift the spirits. You find out what the weather is really like, sometimes you can watch the sun rise or set or see the stars or some natural beauty and you can be totally alone in your thoughts or talk to other dog walkers.

I love my dog walks but I watch other dog walkers and think that I am so lucky that my dog is a boy. Every day, I see people standing in fields or on grass verges, clutching a plastic bag, scanning the floor for hours. As I approach they always shrug and say, "it must have been a wee!" Female dogs have the same position for both acts but with a boy dog you are never fooled into looking for a wee. They stand there on 3 legs,  defiantly balanced against thin air or scrunch themselves up in a crouch that says, "Don't bother me! I'm busy!"

Dog walks are great but I really don't have time for a bitch.