A music teacher's nightmare

You wake up in a cold sweat, breathing heavily with a sensation that an anxious elephant is sitting on your chest.  What could possibly be wrong?  Was that real or was it a dream?  Did it happen or even worse is it a prophecy of what is soon to happen?

That happened to me last night.  For hours I had been dreaming about teaching KS1 children to accompany Away in a Manger with percussion instruments.  I had one group who were meant to play the triangle on the first beat of the bar, while the second group were to play maracas on the second and third beats.  Six year olds find three beats in the bar tricky. Nearly all the music they have heard has 4 beats with a drummer banging out the beat - or a drum machine giving a mixture of beats.

Away in the Manger is even more difficult because it has an anacrusis (or upbeat).  Over and over again the dream children played in the wrong places.  They just couldn't get it.  Finally, it was concert day and I was ready, they were ready.  They'd practised until my ears hurt.  Just as the concert was about to start and I would find out if these nightmarish children had finally got it I woke up.  

The clock on my bedside was flashing:

Spooky.

If that nightmare hadn't been difficult enough I knew that in my kitchen another nightmare was waiting for me.  The kind of nightmare that can only be had by primary school music teachers. For two hours before going to bed I had been wrestling with coconuts.  The Long Suffering Husband had been sent into the shed with 4 whole coconuts and a selection of power tools to drain the milk out and cut the shells into perfect halves.  Then it was my turn to remove all the flesh.  After about two hours I gave up, knowing that I still had another 2 to do in the morning. I did wonder if this was above and beyond the call of duty but you can't have a nativity without donkeys and you can't have donkey noises without coconut shells and coconut shells break when they are dropped.

After all this I still had some lessons to plan.  The coconut shells and a video a colleague had posted on facebook had got me thinking about making instruments.  Then thirst took over, so I poured out my drink in different glasses and played Away in a Manger. 

 I wonder if using wine rather than coke would have given me a better night's sleep.