My daughter tweeted that she was feeling homesick for the first time today. Her friend tweeted, "Who's with me? #OperationBeat4WeekBlues." I'm with them and so this blog is dedicated to this cause.
Although, there is a lot I don't remember about my college days (I am very old and an awful lot of alcohol was consumed) I have a vague recollection of feeling miserable just before Halloween.
There are several things that could cause these 'blues'.
It might be homesickness, when you suddenly realise that you have actually sort-of left home. No matter how excited you were to go, or how sick of your over-fussing Mum or nagging Dad after a while you do start to miss it. You can't just have a 'Mummy hug' when you need one, there is no one to cook your dinner or wash your sheets. The everyday drudgery of just living seems like too much to cope with all on your own.
Then again, it might just be your liver having a major protest. "No, help! Please! No more! The 2 weeks in Falaraki was OK but then I had a rest. Please can we just have orange juice tonight?"
The blues might be caused by the weather. Let's be honest, 4 weeks after most students start University, summer is finally over. We are currently experiencing levels of mizzle (mist and drizzle) that make your hair go curly and stop it from getting properly light all day. Any moment now, it's going to get really cold and only the hardy Northerners and true Essex Girls will be able to go out in a belt, t-shirt and sandals. It might be SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder) due to the lack of light.
It could also be a nutritional issue. For the first time you are feeding yourself and the 7th Pot Noodle, Jacket Potato or Pasta with Pesto of the week may not be filling all of your nutritional needs. Lack of B vitamins, Vitamin C, Magnesium, Calcium, Potassium Iron, Manganese and Zinc all can lead to depression.
And finally, there's the work. Suddenly you realise what you came to University for. It wasn't the parties, the drinking or the making of dubious food. It was to get a degree and that means work - hard work - and lots of it. Not the kind of work you did in the sixth form, where you got your teachers notes onto your page without it passing through either of your brains. No, this is proper thinking. You have to read books and use your brain. Scary stuff!
But what can you do to beat the blues?
The first thing to know is that you're not alone. Everyone's just a bit miserable. Everyone hates the weather. Everyone finds the work hard. Everyone has drunk too much. Everyone is eating badly. Everyone is fed up of doing their own washing (especially your parents - who have been doing it for much longer and have been doing yours too!) So, talk to each other. Don't hide away and be gloomy.
Get out. Get some exercise. Join the gym, go for a swim, run to the supermarket.
Eat well, try to get as many colours on your plate as possible. Eat some food that makes you feel happy. Marmite, chocolate, fish oil, nuts, oats and Spinach. Comfort food isn't called that by chance - eat some. My favourite is my own invention - a Snickers Sandwich: Wholemeal bread(B Vitamins), spread on one half with crunch peanut butter and Nutella on the other. To my daughter's friend who tweeted about whether it would be rude to take Porridge into a lecture I say it would be rude not to. Porridge is fantastic for the blues - just ask the 3 Bears.
Sing. (There is nothing else to say about this - singing cures everything!)
When my daughter was very little she used to ask for coloured hugs. She would say, "Can I have a Pink Cuddle?" I would think pink as I hugged her and it seemed to work. It wasn't always pink. Sometimes it was green, blue, purple or yellow. I don't ever remember her asking for a red or brown cuddle. Thinking back to this I wonder if surrounding yourself with the right colours might also be important. There is an interesting article in Psychology Today about colour and Depression http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-mindfulness-approach/200912/what-color-is-your-depression-overcoming-depression-mindfulness
Meditation and mindfulness might seem too tricky but there's nothing wrong with wearing bright colours or just thinking pink.
What shouldn't you do
My first reaction when my daughter tweeted about homesickness was to think she might come home or that I should go up and see her. (The four week blues hits us parents too - although the permanently tidy bedroom, the amount of time saved in not having to be a taxi and the fact that we can eat meat all the time do make it easier) . It would be a mistake though. Any sadness is normal and we can all get through it.
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