Sex Bubbles

I know you’ve all stopped listening to the daily coronavirus briefing but it’s still part of my daily routine. Yesterday, it was Boris and an announcement that even he didn’t seem clear on. They also changed the slides again and compared some figures from two weeks ago to make it look more favourable. The Prime Minister came across as a rabbit caught in the headlights and the scientists (yay, they’re back!) admitted that if they had to do it again they would lockdown earlier.

I fear that to other countries we look like fools. My cousin in Australia told me that they are very worried about the situation in the UK.

I’m trying to remind myself that none of this was going to be easy and that hindsight is a wonderful thing. All countries that have eased lockdown (except Mexico) have seen cases continue to fall. Ours are still falling slowly. Plagues don’t last forever, not even the one in 1666, where they didn’t understand the science/maths.

Anyway, back to Boris’s announcement.

“You can have sex in a bubble if you are a single person, living on your own but not in a reptile house.”

There you go. Clear as flamingo poo.

Actually, I’m mocking but it does make sense and it isn’t about sex, although if you live alone you can have sex with someone and can even, legitimately, drive to Durham to do it. It’s for all the lonely and recently bereaved grandparents who have been asking for weeks when they can hug their grandchildren. They are calling it a support bubble.

It is fraught with social difficulty, though because they can only pick one family as their support bubble.
“Why does grandma like Freddy and Emily more than me?”
“It’s not you, darling. It’s me. Susan was always her favourite!”

A lot of young people, missing their partners will be furious. Many young people, living in shared houses are very lonely and would be very grateful of a support bubble. Let’s hope they are the people to be thought of in the next round of lockdown easings.