Excuses

Any music teacher will have heard more excuses than you would think possible.

Each lesson starts with, "I'm sorry I haven't practised my flute but..."

This week I have heard:

1. It was Christmas
2. My flute was allergic to mince pies
3. I'm thinking about giving up
4. The saxophone seems like it would be a better instrument for me
5. I left my book in the spare room and it's only just been cleared out after my grandma stayed.
6.  My rabbit ate my book.
7. I just had a lazy holiday.

I have also been doing recorder work with key stage one children (which isn't easy with a headache)  They are supposed to have their own recorder but they can borrow a school one for the lesson if they've forgotten.  I don't make a big deal out of it.  They can just use one but they insist on telling me why they haven't got one.  The most common reason is, "My mum doesn't like recorders," but this week I heard the best excuse.

"It fell out of the car window.  I share my recorder with my brother.  We were driving to Scotland and my brother thought he was being so clever.  He was playing that piece that they  learnt in class.  You know, the sword dance.  He was playing it over and over.  He thought he was so clever.  He'd played it about a hundred times."

I was beginning to feel sorry for his parents. Trapped in the car with the same recorder tune a hundred times would make me not like recorders.

"Anyway," he continued, "the car window was open and he played the tune one more time. He thought he was so clever and his recorder fell out of the open window."

"That was unlucky," I said, thinking exactly the opposite.

"Yes," he said, "It was unlucky.  He could have played the sword dance all the way to Scotland and he thought he was so clever.  My parents would have stopped the car but we wouldn't have found it because it was on the motorway and a lorry ran over it."

I can't help wondering if this recorder flying out of the window of a 70 mile an hour speeding car wasn't quite as accidental as he was suggesting.